Thursday, January 20, 2011

Like A Virgin

-Let me tell you what
"Like A Virgin" is about.

It's all about a girl
who digs a guy with a big dick.

The entire song
is a metaphor for big dicks.

-No, it ain't.

It's about a girl
who's very vulnerable.

She's been fucked over a few times
and she meets a guy who's sensitive.

-Whoa. Timeout.
Tell that bullshit to the tourists.

-Toby? Who the fuck is Toby?

-"Like A Virgin" is not about some
sensitive girl who meets a nice fella.

That's what "True Blue" is about.
No argument about that.

- Which one is "True Blue"?
- It was a big-ass hit for Madonna.

I don't even follow that top-of-the-pops
shit, and I've heard of "True Blue."

-I didn't say I ain't heard of it.
All I asked is, how's it go?

Excuse me for not being
the world's biggest Madonna fan.

-Personally, I can do without her.

I used to like her early stuff,

but once she got off with that
"Papa, Don't Preach" phase, I tuned out.

-Hey, you guys are making me
lose my train of thought here.

I was sayin' something.
What was it?

-Oh, Toby's that
little Chinese girl.

What was her last name?
- What's that?

-It's an old address book I found in
a coat I haven't worn in a coon's age.

- What was that name?

- What the fuck was I talkin' about?

-You said "True Blue"
was about a guy--

a sensitive girl
who meets a nice guy...

but "Like A Virgin"
was a metaphor for big dicks.

-Let me tell you what
"Like A Virgin" is about.

It's all about this cooze
who's a regular fuck machine.

I'm talkin' morning, day,
night, afternoon...

dick, dick, dick, dick, dick,
dick, dick, dick, dick!

- How many "dicks" is that?
- A lot.

-Then one day, she meets
this John Holmes motherfucker.

It's like, "Whoa, baby." He's like
Charles Bronson in "The Great Escape."

He's diggin' tunnels.
Now she's gettin' serious dick action.

She's feelin' somethin' she ain't
felt since forever: pain, pain.

-Chew? Toby Chew?

-It hurts. It hurts her.

It shouldn't hurt her.
Her pussy should be Bubble-Yum by now.

But when this cat
fucks her, it hurts.

It hurts just like it did
the first time.

You see, the pain
is reminding a fuck machine...

what it was once like
to be a virgin.

Hence, "Like A Virgin."

~~~ Reservoir Dogs (1992)


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