Before I even met J for the first time at the coffee shop, he sent me emails questioning my relationship status. He wanted to know if I had a boyfriend or why I do not have a boyfriend when he obviously thinks I’m attractive. I told him that I got out of a ‘bad’ relationship two years ago and have been single ever since. This is true, if you don’t count the hundreds of men I screwed in the interim. But who needs to mention that. Haha
During our first meet, (Sugar Baby - First Kiss), he asked me what I would do if I got into a relationship while we were in an arrangement? I re-assured him once more that I’m not exposing myself in a way that would lead me to a boyfriend, but if for some reason I do in the future, I would let him know right away.
Two weeks into our official arrangement, I received a text from J. It was a request that I delete my sugar profile from the website, if I do wish to pursue our relationship and I’m happy with how things are progressing.
I hate leaving all my eggs in one basket. It makes me feel vulnerable, so I wrote the following: “I am very happy with the direction of our relationship and I do not mind removing my profile off the site. I haven’t visited the site since we’ve met, so I am curious if you would trust me, if I do not remove my profile?”
I thought if I throw in the trust bit, I would put him on the spot. I waited to see how he’d slip past this. In an hour or two I got a response, “I do trust you but find myself guarded not being able to understand why you would not delete your profile.” It must have taken him some time to come up with that!
I indulged him. He also deleted his profile.
In our latest talk of loyalty, he revealed a need to be with someone who will be exclusive. The reasons are - emotional dependence and physical safety. He wants to be able to think of me and smile. Look forward to each and every visit. And he hopes that I would feel the same way. He even asked if the allowance is enough to satisfy my needs. I said, “It sounds to me like you want to have a mistress, am I right?” He nodded.
How do I feel about it? I like the sound of mistress as opposed to sugar baby. I have always pictured a sugar baby as an 18 year old blonde with a fake tan. She isn’t serious and really has not figured out a plan for the next 5 to 10 years.
I don’t know if the mistress title carries more responsibility? How does it differ from being a sugar baby, I guess I will find out :)